Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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