You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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