every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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