So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
