Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
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