He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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