the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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