that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
