Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
