Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize