Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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