if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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