I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just found a bag of teeth...
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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