After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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