i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
