dude i'm inner monologue high
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
