left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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