Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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