I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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