Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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