i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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