only if we run a train.
done.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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