Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
