I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
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