Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
