dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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