Small penises have feelings too.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
