Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)

  (540): View more from Virginia

  awesome babe! drinks tonight!

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.

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  (703): Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :) (540): awesome babe! drinks tonight! (703): Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck. http://tfl.nu/zccd
  Replies (12) Good night (775) Bad night (2906)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.

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  (570): She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex. http://tfl.nu/nznj
  Replies (27) Good night (2491) Bad night (739)
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  (646): View more from New York

  I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback

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  (646): I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback http://tfl.nu/fcgu
  Replies (22) Good night (3390) Bad night (842)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.

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  (912): There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up. http://tfl.nu/juwj
  Replies (25) Good night (10177) Bad night (1000)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.

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  (304): I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk. http://tfl.nu/30xs
  Replies (38) Good night (10647) Bad night (1087)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night

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  (610): There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night http://tfl.nu/8wbo
  Replies (8) Good night (3904) Bad night (923)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.

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  (228): you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out. http://tfl.nu/9xp5
  Replies (19) Good night (3839) Bad night (1417)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.

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  (574): It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later. http://tfl.nu/qtru
  Replies (9) Good night (2301) Bad night (1001)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.

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  (308): Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick. http://tfl.nu/8mtk
  Replies (12) Good night (3362) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.

  (914): View more from New York

  I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.

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  (914): If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded. (914): I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit. http://tfl.nu/hj4l
  Replies (14) Good night (1892) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.

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  (206): Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me. http://tfl.nu/grf1
  Replies (7) Good night (916) Bad night (1389)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco

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  (850): My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco http://tfl.nu/szsc
  Replies (5) Good night (1442) Bad night (455)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.

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  (563): I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took. http://tfl.nu/2cez
  Replies (7) Good night (1236) Bad night (433)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea

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  (907): Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea http://tfl.nu/9w6p
  Replies (6) Good night (293) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced

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  (425): Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced http://tfl.nu/tykz
  Replies (0) Good night (448) Bad night (339)

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