Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
