i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
All the doctor said was why
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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