Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
