remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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