I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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