So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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