he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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