Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize