he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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