like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
