So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
