I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
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