I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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