Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Randomize
