I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
