margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
