: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i came on her dog
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
