I just pynch a tree in the face
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
