I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
