your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
