Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
