Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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